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Crazy ideas
Toddlers possibly to be banned from USA
Toddlers possibly to be banned from USA
Inspired by a rich politician's idea of banning Muslims from entering the USA as a way of curbing specifically Islamist terrorism (terrorists who claim other faiths are welcome), US Congress and particularly the Republican party is considering this ingenious method of curbing other problems.

It has come to the attention of the US Congress that a greater threat to US security than terrorists are armed toddlers. Until Congress has fully grasped how toddlers manage to get hold of loaded guns and, more importantly, until they have found a method of recognizing which toddlers are likely to use their parents' loaded an unattended firearms, it has been proposed to ban new toddlers from entering the USA.

After heavy discussions on the theme, a Democrat proposed a gun control law, allowing only people who do not have toddlers to have guns. "Make your pick - do you want a gun or a toddler?" The proposal was amazingly accepted by Republicans on the grounds that gun wielding toddlers were already enforcing the law through immediate death penalty.

"Not only do these toddlers show that they are ready to enforce the law," a high standing politician exclaimed, "they show that they are ready to keep up the statistics of our police force. You are currently eight times more likely to get killed by police than a terrorist in the USA. With toddlers on board, we could potentially increase it to nine."

Congress then hurried on to the next possibility on the list: Banning drivers from entering the US. As many as 40 000 people die every year from accidents that involve drivers. Until Congress has found a way to identify which drivers are cause accidents, nobody with a driver's license should be allowed to enter the country.

As there are many drivers already on US soil, it was further proposed that everyone who carry a driver's license should report to police immediately and get a large "L" for "Licensed Driver" tattooed on their forehead.

A spokesperson from the DOT explained the tattoo, "it makes it possible for people to see who might be a reckless driver, as these typically have driver's licenses. If you see a car driven by someone with a large L on their forehead, you must be cautious. Whereas a car driven by someone without a license can be considered safe."

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